There are certain mornings when we wake up encouraged to wonder what kind of world we would like to live in. We wonder what kind of world we’ve inherited from our mothers, grandmothers, sisters, those who have made us who we are. We wonder what kind of world we want for our children. We might even wonder what kind of world we want for people who are quite different from us: different in race, in gender expression, in sexuality, different in terms of access to money, wealth and social capital. We awaken and see that nothing, truly nothing is settled, permanent, fixed, set in stone. This is true for the court of law too. And this is very frightening sometimes. Many have taken to the streets in the past week in response to the leak from the Supreme Court saying in a draft opinion that a majority intend to overturn Roe v. Wade, the landmark civil rights case which gave women the constitutional right to an abortion.

The move to overturn this landmark case is bringing us once again to a reckoning in this country, a reckoning with who we are, giving us the opportunity to have a response this morning. A reckoning of how we as a society have treated women, how we will treat women today.

Each of us is a creator and a nurturer. Each of us is producing the reality we all experience, and each of us is deciding through our attention what we will nurture, and what we will leave alone. Many years ago, there was a false dichotomy presented about nature vs nurture, nature being our innate biology and nurture being the social context of our lives. Due to our current environmental situation, we now understand that our social context informs biology, that our nurture or lack of nurture can create a place where forms of nature can thrive or perish. Nature gives us the opportunity for nurture, and nurture in turn creates the lived experience of nature. Being a nurturer is coming to understand how one decision impacts the multitude, how one action impacts everything, not just one thing.

 

Any one person is created by the nurture or lack thereof, and in turn each person’s actions either support or disrupt avenues of health and life. It is becoming even more obvious that the Constitution, the law of this land, and those confirmed to interpret that law are using a framework that is narrow. It’s a framework bound up with its origins: white men, Christians primarily concerned with property and the accumulation of wealth. We are seeing this today with the repeal of voting rights. We are seeing this with the ways we maintain poverty, and then punish the poor for being poor by locking them up. Even before this leak of the Supreme Court, we have witnessed the disparity in healthcare, decided by class. We see a good majority of our population unable to afford and/or navigate getting their healthcare needs met. And this has been true for years.

And now the Supreme Court is considering putting another obstacle in front of a series of obstacles, forcing women who don’t want to be mothers to either become mothers, or risk getting an abortion from a non-medical professional in dangerous circumstances, if they can’t afford to travel to a place where a doctor can perform an abortion safely. It’s a consideration based on a very narrow view and set of interests.

I appreciate activists who have given us a new framework for understanding the situation we are in. It is beyond pro choice or pro life, a simplistic dichotomy that doesn’t quite get to the truth, much like the false dichotomy of nature vs nurture. Women who are Black, Indigenous, and People of Color have instead offered a holistic way of approaching this taking into account multiple factors of our humanity.

This is the definition of reproductive justice defined by the SisterSong Women of Color Reproductive Justice Collective as “the human right to maintain personal bodily autonomy, have children, not have children, and parent the children we have in safe and sustainable communities.” And this is a brief explanation from Sherronda J. Brown: We not only deserve the right to make our own decisions concerning whether or not to have children, but we also deserve the ability to nurture any children we do have in safe communities, without the interference of the state, and without police killing, abusing, sexually assaulting, and terrorizing us.

It starts with bodily autonomy and it goes further: saying that we should not just have a culture that allows women to have a choice about their pregnancy, we should all act as agents of nurture to make sure those children are safe, that those communities are healthy and sustainable, that we have resources to support women and their bodies if they choose to have children or not. Can we guarantee that? The answer today is clearly no, not yet.

It begins with bodily autonomy, the right to self determination. But reproductive justice offers us a different lens, where we come to appreciate that not everyone has an equal choice in any given situation, hence the injustice. If Roe v Wade gets struck down, those without the ability to travel to a place that offers safe healthcare for those needing an abortion will be left to themselves without proper medical care. And on top of not having proper medical care available, they will likely be imprisoned if they take matters into their own hands and do the best they can with few resources. And we become even more a state that in essence seeks to control the bodies of the poor, those of color, those of marginalized gender identities. We will as a society be forcing pregnancy and then giving our communities few resources to raise their child in a way that is safe or sustainable. So I agree with the outrage I’m witnessing. It’s dystopian. It’s violent, violent towards women and our community. In a very real way, you and I will have a tangible say in what it means to be a citizen in this country.

In America we celebrate exceptions, those who are born in certain circumstances who beat the odds and have different outcomes for themselves. But we are weak in flexing our nurture muscles, and wondering why this person needed to be the exception? We create stories that blame those put in hard spots as having a moral failing or not working hard enough or not being as intelligent, when in truth we are afraid to face ourselves as citizens of this country and see the way we’ve remained docile in a system that perpetuates a hierarchy based on birth, on gender, on race, and on class. So I’m encouraged when I see people upset. It means that we’re not completely numb or asleep, it means that this morning we can discover a way to nurture a world where women and persons have the right to self determination.

It also may mean perhaps there is an opening to wonder how we might correct injustice in our communities that actively afflict our families – mothers, women, and all people.

I would like to see a country where we can confidently say that this is a safe and sustainable community for a child to grow up in. I would like to live in a country that if a mother gives birth we can guarantee as a community that they will not have to live in dire poverty because of the cost of healthcare, child care, and student debt. I would like to live in a community that doesn’t punish women for having children and punish people for being poor. I would like to live in a community where all women and persons have access to high quality health care, whether they want to to have children or not, whether they need an abortion or not. And if we are not able or willing to nurture that reality, we will be jeopardizing the lives of women, jeopardizing the lives of our families, jeopardizing not just this country but the world at large.

 

I see Mother’s Day a little differently this year. I understand a little bit more clearly how each of us here nurtures and creates the reality that impacts the experience of motherhood, the experience of being a child, the experience of being a partner, a family in the current country we’ve set up. And there are mothers who endure these hardships, and offer love and tenderness, and a steadfast strength. My mom was one of those people, and I know we have mothers here who have endured difficulties and still found a way to raise their children into kind, good people. I see more clearly the sacrifices my mother made, not because it was an intrinsic part of motherhood, but because our society demanded a certain kind of sacrifice. The sacrifice of becoming American, which is really not American in the most accurate sense, but in the narrow and violent sense: conforming to a Christian, white, upwardly mobile ethos. My mom was conscious of this, and she tried to figure out ways for me and my siblings to have opportunities she never had.

We call that an American story, even a success story. But maybe it’s just because I’m younger and was born in this country, I don’t see that as the goal anymore. We shouldn’t have to teach our children to survive by toeing certain lines so they can be better consumers. I think there are higher aims than that available to us, if we realize it. We can become nurturers. We can nurture what is possible, a place where mothers of various backgrounds can feel supported in raising children. A world for those who determine they don’t want to have children, and give them proper healthcare to make that decision, where we can nurture their life too. A world that is about far more than removing obstacles. A world created of a community of you and me that actively nurtures health and a full life. A world that sees the birth of a child as a sacred responsibility grounded in the agency and autonomy of the mother. A world that values life, a world that values choice, a world that makes both things possible for every single citizen.

That is the world we have before us this morning, a vision available to us, if we act before it’s too late. Nothing is settled, nothing is fixed, nothing is set in stone. Our actions and intentions today can nurture a woman across her lifetime. And this doesn’t mean that life will be simple or easy, or that we will create a utopia. But we can show each other that we actually care, and that we want to nurture a different possibility on this day. A day that nurtures self determination, the ability to determine your destiny given the options. A day that seeks to expand those options, and do more than remove obstacles from the past, but create new positive pathways where our community might find health.

Right now there are ways to respond by attending rallies, investing in organizations that are concerned about the health of women. But beyond this moment, I welcome all of us to be mindful of the holistic health of women that is tied directly to the health of our communities.

I invite us to wonder how we might nurture a community that is safe and sustainable for children and families of all backgrounds, how we might nurture the communities we are part of toward health and healing. May we find a way to nurture this.

The body is sacred and women’s bodies are sacred. Let us honor this reality by creating pathways for self determination, and not stopping there. But going much further, helping to create safe and sustainable communities for women after they’ve made their choice about potential motherhood, whatever it may be. Only then will we come to know the true meaning of liberty, and how true freedom depends on our willingness to find a way to nurture each other.

Topics: Mother's Day